


sometimes things hurt

by eddie_writes



Category: IT (Movies - Muschietti), IT - Stephen King
Genre: Bad Parenting, Eddie Kaspbrak Loves Richie Tozier, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Manipulation, M/M, Mentioned Ben Hanscom, Mentioned Beverly Marsh, Mentioned Bill Denbrough, Mentioned Mike Hanlon, Mentioned Stanley Uris, Richie Tozier-centric, Sad, Self-Esteem Issues, Self-Hatred, Soft Richie Tozier
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-31
Updated: 2019-12-31
Packaged: 2021-02-27 04:53:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 644
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22041364
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eddie_writes/pseuds/eddie_writes
Summary: Sometimes things hurt and there's nothing you can do about it.
Relationships: Eddie Kaspbrak & Richie Tozier, Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier, The Losers Club & Richie Tozier
Comments: 1
Kudos: 47





	sometimes things hurt

**Author's Note:**

> This is sad and talks about self esteem issues and acne, as well as picking at acne.
> 
> I wrote this as a way to vent my feelings after this exact event happened to me earlier and I wanted to share. 
> 
> There is nothing wrong with having acne!! Some people are just assholes who make us feel bad about ourselves for having it!
> 
> Gonna make a part 2 that's a hurt and comfort thing with Reddie. Eddie cheering Richie up after he finally opens up and maybe a crush admittance.

Richie was self-conscious. 

It was his parents' fault, much like his other self esteem issues were. Richie never told anyone about those. 

He didn't like to talk about his feelings. Sure, he would laugh at himself and jokingly say "I'm hurt!" but it didn't go further than that. Because Richie just, didn't let it. 

It's not that he didn't want to talk about it though - of course he did, sometimes - but that was hard to do when all people knew you for were your cheap jokes and your shitty personality. For someone to find out that you have actual feelings, after all that... Richie couldn't imagine what they'd say. 

It does hurt though. 

Richie didn't like how he looked. The stupidly big glasses he wore, his crooked teeth, his pale face. Worst of all was the acne. God, Richie looked like someone had blown up a battlefield on his face and left the bleeding soldiers on display. 

Okay, not a great analogy, but you get the point. Richie couldn't help that he had acne, and he couldn't help himself from picking at it. 

It made things worse, he knew. He just couldn't stop. 

It hurt to look in a mirror and think, God, did I get uglier overnight? So he tried not to think it, but the notion still stayed with him. He was unattractive. He just was. 

There was nothing he could do about it either. Richie had tried not eating sugar, not eating much of anything, not picking at the pimples dotting his skin, using fancy face wash, not washing his face for a while. Nothing helped; he was screwed. 

So he made peace with it, as much as he could, but he was almost 20 and his acne was still awful. He ignored it nowadays. Yeah, he still picked at it - that was practically ingrained in him at this point - and he still washed his face, and nothing worked but he just ignored it. Richie was good at ignoring things. 

He was stil living with his parents, another thing he was trying not to think about. He went grocery shopping with them and ate dinner with them and pretended like he gave a damn about them. 

One night, at the grocery store, Richie's dad looked at him hard and said, "You have a scratch on your face or something," under his breath. Richie knew it wasn't a scratch. He'd picked a whitehead there earlier in the day, but he'd already cleaned away the blood and remains. 

He rolled his eyes and pretended not to have heard the comment. Then his dad continued, "Or did you pick that? Looks like you're bleeding."

Richie huffed, glaring at Wentworth. "It's nothing," he said, a bit desperately. 

See, his parents did this kind of shit all the time. They would point out all of his flaws and make him feel even worse about himself until he'd take it to heart, try whatever bullshit his mom thinks will help fix him. Richie didn't want to be fixed. He just wanted to be happy. 

They kept shopping and Richie kept his face down. Thankful for his long hair, he tugged a few curls loose from under his beanie and tried to cover his cheeks with them. It probably didn't work well but he felt less exposed like that. It helped, a little. 

They were standing in the medicinal isle, looking for some vitamins his mom remembered she wanted at the last minute, when the next comment came. 

"Maybe you should be taking some vitamins," Wentworth said, in lieu of Richie's joke about how he "hadn't taken a vitamin since he was like ten!" and how he "was still alive without them". 

Richie frowned at him, and said, "Really," in the meanest, deadpan he could manage. 

Sometimes things hurt and there was nothing Richie could do about it.


End file.
